Dad's New Girlfriend
Posted by an anonymous user on 7/8/2008 5:06:00 PM
Dear Dad,
When you decided to get a divorce I understood because when someone cheats on you, you deserve to start over. Believe me, I don't want to limit you from living your life, but I don't want to be involved in your new girlfriend's life either. Why can't you understand that I just want a relationship with you and not your girlfriend or her children? I know that after I've gone to college in the fall that you'll use them to replace me anyway. I feel replaced already. I know they're your kind of people, they smoke, drink, and do whatever they want and all that, and you know that I've always tried to keep all of that out of my life because of what my mom did and because the harm that I've seen it do in this family. Honestly, I want sometimes to just never look back once I get to college and just use the vastness of NYC to take care of all my problems. You seem very happy with them all, and, well, I guess that's a good thing. I just feel so cut out. You know that I try to be good; I always have. I just hate that you want me to accept these children of hers like it's no big deal. They're 16 and 17 they should be in school! You expect me, first in my class, to just buddy up to these dropouts. I don't think you understand me at all sometimes. We're just so different and value different things. You love motorcycles, and I love fine food. I get that we're different and that that's been hard for you to cope with. I just always thought that you would value your own daughter that you've known and loved for eighteen years more than any new relationship that you had after the divorce. I hate that you're letting her control you, change you. I can't believe that you would try to start controlling me only to look good for your girlfriend because she can't control her children. You never controlled me before. Why? You know that I would never do anything stupid. But I guess that trust doesn't mean much anymore. I feel like this whole situation is bringing out the worst in me. You can make me go to counseling, sure. You can trap me into meeting your new girlfriend sure. You can be insulted when I shut down around them those few times because when I look at them I see a future without me in it. All of that's just fine. All you're doing is making me resent you and what you're doing. I know this is the last year that we'll be living in our house before it goes back to the people that bought it, and I know that you want to be able to have them over. I tried telling you how terrible it made me feel, but you didn't want to understand. All you care about is having those degenerate people and all their trashy friends over. For the time being you are not, which I thank you for, but I wonder if this will just make you resent me in the future, too. I'm eighteen after all and I just think it would be easier if I moved out a little early. I mean, of course you'll be spending all your time with them here after I'm gone anyway. I feel like I've just lost both my parents for good. I mean, you both were not very good to begin with, but at least I felt I could talk to you. Now I just feel so abandoned. I've always been very independent and proud, but I just wish that I could keep you in my life a little longer.
Your Daughter
Tags: divorce
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When you decided to get a divorce I understood because when someone cheats on you, you deserve to start over. Believe me, I don't want to limit you from living your life, but I don't want to be involved in your new girlfriend's life either. Why can't you understand that I just want a relationship with you and not your girlfriend or her children? I know that after I've gone to college in the fall that you'll use them to replace me anyway. I feel replaced already. I know they're your kind of people, they smoke, drink, and do whatever they want and all that, and you know that I've always tried to keep all of that out of my life because of what my mom did and because the harm that I've seen it do in this family. Honestly, I want sometimes to just never look back once I get to college and just use the vastness of NYC to take care of all my problems. You seem very happy with them all, and, well, I guess that's a good thing. I just feel so cut out. You know that I try to be good; I always have. I just hate that you want me to accept these children of hers like it's no big deal. They're 16 and 17 they should be in school! You expect me, first in my class, to just buddy up to these dropouts. I don't think you understand me at all sometimes. We're just so different and value different things. You love motorcycles, and I love fine food. I get that we're different and that that's been hard for you to cope with. I just always thought that you would value your own daughter that you've known and loved for eighteen years more than any new relationship that you had after the divorce. I hate that you're letting her control you, change you. I can't believe that you would try to start controlling me only to look good for your girlfriend because she can't control her children. You never controlled me before. Why? You know that I would never do anything stupid. But I guess that trust doesn't mean much anymore. I feel like this whole situation is bringing out the worst in me. You can make me go to counseling, sure. You can trap me into meeting your new girlfriend sure. You can be insulted when I shut down around them those few times because when I look at them I see a future without me in it. All of that's just fine. All you're doing is making me resent you and what you're doing. I know this is the last year that we'll be living in our house before it goes back to the people that bought it, and I know that you want to be able to have them over. I tried telling you how terrible it made me feel, but you didn't want to understand. All you care about is having those degenerate people and all their trashy friends over. For the time being you are not, which I thank you for, but I wonder if this will just make you resent me in the future, too. I'm eighteen after all and I just think it would be easier if I moved out a little early. I mean, of course you'll be spending all your time with them here after I'm gone anyway. I feel like I've just lost both my parents for good. I mean, you both were not very good to begin with, but at least I felt I could talk to you. Now I just feel so abandoned. I've always been very independent and proud, but I just wish that I could keep you in my life a little longer.
Your Daughter
Tags: divorce
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give him the letter
Posted by Mn on 7/10/2008 8:29:00 PM (Report abuse)
I don't have the same problem, but i want you to know that was a very well written letter and you may want to give a copy to your father.
Posted by Sincere on 7/10/2008 1:26:00 AM (Report abuse)