Eventually feels like forever...
Posted by an anonymous user on 6/30/2008 10:55:00 PM
I am a 15 year old guy and I haven't ever had a "real" girlfriend, or hooked up with a girl. (In 8th grade I "went out" with a girl but we sort of just became better friends, and didn't do much because her parents didn't want her dating and they didn't know about me anyway) The thing is, I am fairly good looking, smart, and funny yet where most of my (guy) friends have succeed, I failed. (Actually all of those things I have been starting to feel bad about and think negatively of because of my failures, which leads me to the second part...)
Since last year I really liked a specific girl not only for her appearance, but for the amazing amount of small things we had in common; in fact despite what I have always believed about love being something that younger people often don't truly feel until later in their lives, I think I might have loved her at one point. I got up the courage to ask her out one day, and I found out that one of my good friends asked her out the same day which upset me majorly. They broke up later on that year before the summer, but the girl was really upset by it (because she is pretty emotionally sensitive), and so I decided I'd wait until the end of August at the end of summer when I would see her again to try asking her out again. She had a crush on someone else at that time and hooked up with them, and eventually when I got the chance to make a move a little while after that was over, she sort of rejected me, but without actually saying it.. She is the kind of person who doesn't ever want to upset anyone and always acts very kind. She just got upset when I told her how I felt and explained the whole background (mostly what I just wrote in this paragraph), and it really seemed that it was because she didn't like me back and felt guilty for making me feel bad, and now she still wants to be friends with me, but it is way too hard for me to deal with doing that because I don't just like her as a friend right now.
Anyways... I am moving pretty far away from where I currently live and so I will get over it eventually with time and distance, but regardless I feel that I will not have a good relationship or a first kiss for a long time, and I feel like by the time I do kiss a girl, I will screw it up and be really embarrassed.
This might sound pretty cliche in some ways, but does anyone have any advice other than saying, "Don't worry, things will happen eventually..." because eventually... feels like an extremely long time;
and that, is my secret.
Tags: love, girlfriend, relationship, kiss, first, hook, up, date, depressed, heart, break, heartbreak, heartbroken
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Since last year I really liked a specific girl not only for her appearance, but for the amazing amount of small things we had in common; in fact despite what I have always believed about love being something that younger people often don't truly feel until later in their lives, I think I might have loved her at one point. I got up the courage to ask her out one day, and I found out that one of my good friends asked her out the same day which upset me majorly. They broke up later on that year before the summer, but the girl was really upset by it (because she is pretty emotionally sensitive), and so I decided I'd wait until the end of August at the end of summer when I would see her again to try asking her out again. She had a crush on someone else at that time and hooked up with them, and eventually when I got the chance to make a move a little while after that was over, she sort of rejected me, but without actually saying it.. She is the kind of person who doesn't ever want to upset anyone and always acts very kind. She just got upset when I told her how I felt and explained the whole background (mostly what I just wrote in this paragraph), and it really seemed that it was because she didn't like me back and felt guilty for making me feel bad, and now she still wants to be friends with me, but it is way too hard for me to deal with doing that because I don't just like her as a friend right now.
Anyways... I am moving pretty far away from where I currently live and so I will get over it eventually with time and distance, but regardless I feel that I will not have a good relationship or a first kiss for a long time, and I feel like by the time I do kiss a girl, I will screw it up and be really embarrassed.
This might sound pretty cliche in some ways, but does anyone have any advice other than saying, "Don't worry, things will happen eventually..." because eventually... feels like an extremely long time;
and that, is my secret.
Tags: love, girlfriend, relationship, kiss, first, hook, up, date, depressed, heart, break, heartbreak, heartbroken
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It is true that once you get going it all seems soo much easier
all i can suggest, without sounding like some slut, is that you stop trying to be everyones friend and start flirting.
if you feel strongly that you want something to happen then go for it. if you just wait for it to happen it most likely wont happen quickly.
so yeah, flirt abit, go out, find out if there is someone that likes you, have that amazing first kiss, practice makes perfect and yeah so this one girl doesnt like you in that way and that will kinda suck for awhile but - and im afraid im going to have to be cliche - "theres plenty more fish in the sea" xD
all i can suggest, without sounding like some slut, is that you stop trying to be everyones friend and start flirting.
if you feel strongly that you want something to happen then go for it. if you just wait for it to happen it most likely wont happen quickly.
so yeah, flirt abit, go out, find out if there is someone that likes you, have that amazing first kiss, practice makes perfect and yeah so this one girl doesnt like you in that way and that will kinda suck for awhile but - and im afraid im going to have to be cliche - "theres plenty more fish in the sea" xD
Posted by Have You Ever on 7/4/2008 9:37:00 AM (Report abuse)
I wish I had some good advice to offer you, I wish that I could think of something clever and fun to say, I don't even know why I'm responding to this considering the fact that I don't think any of what I say will be useful to you, but...I really wanted to say something.
I won't say my name, but I am fifteen and I know where you are right now. I've been there (I am there) only I seem to be lacking a penis :)
Girls can kind of be bitches sometimes, believe me I know. They never seem to want the nice guys, I have no idea why, but that's how it works out. That's what I've observed through my life so far, within the group of people I hang out with there always seems to be one guy who every girl likes at one point and everybody else is just that guys good friend. In high school, girls can be just as shallow as guys and I guess that's the only insight I can give on that part.
As for the "things will happen eventually" it really does seem like a long time. I know what you mean. I guess, you just have to be confident in the fact that you're a good person, and there might be loads of girls who like you and are just too shy to say anything about it. I mean, I'm even sitting here wishing I knew who you were and wishing I could meet you because you seem pretty goddamn amazing to be so nice and be able to post something kind of personal on a site for the whole world to see. And you also seem amazing because you are one of few guys I know who seem to have the ability to like a girl so much because of what's on the inside, not just what she looks like. Another thing is that it's nice to know that there are people like me who exist in the world, people who worry that they'll screw everything up the first time because they never got the experience when they thought they needed it.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is, yes I'll give you the answer you didn't want, it will happen, I can promise you that, maybe it will be tomorrow, maybe in a week. But it will happen. And if you don't meet an amazing girl until college, why does it matter? Relationships in high school never last and though they make good memories they also bring a lot of bad memories with bitchy, flirtatious, fifteen year old girls who usually don't seem to be interested in anything except One Tree Hill and gossip (yeah, I exaggerated a little bit) Plus, kissing isn't all about technique from what I've gathered, if there's enough chemistry there and you're not thinking too much about it, believe me, you won't screw up and it will be amazing.
I'm sure none of this helped at all but for some strange reason your post seemed worth commenting on, maybe because you're a guy who's the same age as me, I dont know, but please, just promise me that you won't keep on moping around and worrying for the future? Live each day with a new kind of happiness, because now is all you have.
--Smile, you're beautiful
I won't say my name, but I am fifteen and I know where you are right now. I've been there (I am there) only I seem to be lacking a penis :)
Girls can kind of be bitches sometimes, believe me I know. They never seem to want the nice guys, I have no idea why, but that's how it works out. That's what I've observed through my life so far, within the group of people I hang out with there always seems to be one guy who every girl likes at one point and everybody else is just that guys good friend. In high school, girls can be just as shallow as guys and I guess that's the only insight I can give on that part.
As for the "things will happen eventually" it really does seem like a long time. I know what you mean. I guess, you just have to be confident in the fact that you're a good person, and there might be loads of girls who like you and are just too shy to say anything about it. I mean, I'm even sitting here wishing I knew who you were and wishing I could meet you because you seem pretty goddamn amazing to be so nice and be able to post something kind of personal on a site for the whole world to see. And you also seem amazing because you are one of few guys I know who seem to have the ability to like a girl so much because of what's on the inside, not just what she looks like. Another thing is that it's nice to know that there are people like me who exist in the world, people who worry that they'll screw everything up the first time because they never got the experience when they thought they needed it.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is, yes I'll give you the answer you didn't want, it will happen, I can promise you that, maybe it will be tomorrow, maybe in a week. But it will happen. And if you don't meet an amazing girl until college, why does it matter? Relationships in high school never last and though they make good memories they also bring a lot of bad memories with bitchy, flirtatious, fifteen year old girls who usually don't seem to be interested in anything except One Tree Hill and gossip (yeah, I exaggerated a little bit) Plus, kissing isn't all about technique from what I've gathered, if there's enough chemistry there and you're not thinking too much about it, believe me, you won't screw up and it will be amazing.
I'm sure none of this helped at all but for some strange reason your post seemed worth commenting on, maybe because you're a guy who's the same age as me, I dont know, but please, just promise me that you won't keep on moping around and worrying for the future? Live each day with a new kind of happiness, because now is all you have.
--Smile, you're beautiful
Posted by Live.laugh.love on 7/1/2008 2:01:00 AM (Report abuse)
Dude my advice is to knock out your first kiss before you move. It's all a mind game, once you get the first one out of the way its so much easier. I was like you and I'm 18 now and believe me its awesome. The thing you need to remember is that you're only 15. I'm not trying to be condescending at all, but just realize that you havent even come close to reaching your peak yet. Be calm and just get it out of the way. There is always a girl who likes you, even if she isnt very good looking just kiss her and get a feel for it so you're ready for someone you actually like. I'm only 18 man and believe me when I tell you that even now its just begininng so chill out.
Posted by Rob on 7/1/2008 1:27:00 AM (Report abuse)