I loved him and he killed himself
Posted by tryinghard on 9/17/2008 8:25:00 PM
I dated a guy for just over a year. We were very much in love and were planning a future together. (both in our forties)
He suffered a major depressive episode and started pushing me away. I fought back and tried valiantly to get him help. He hated me for that. I knew too much now, about his illness.
He finally started seeing someone else and broke my heart.
After they broke up, I saw he posted an ad on a dating site. I contacted him, pretending to be someone new. A strong friendship struck up and we stayed in touch by email for 2 years. He didn't know it was me. He got engaged to someone else and kept talking to me about being depressed. Almost a year ago, and about 2 months before his wedding date, he killed himself.
I think about him every day, and hope he understands why I stayed in touch with him, posing as someone else. I just couldn't let him go, and needed to know that he was okay.
Tags: suicide, depression, boyfriend
Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post.
He suffered a major depressive episode and started pushing me away. I fought back and tried valiantly to get him help. He hated me for that. I knew too much now, about his illness.
He finally started seeing someone else and broke my heart.
After they broke up, I saw he posted an ad on a dating site. I contacted him, pretending to be someone new. A strong friendship struck up and we stayed in touch by email for 2 years. He didn't know it was me. He got engaged to someone else and kept talking to me about being depressed. Almost a year ago, and about 2 months before his wedding date, he killed himself.
I think about him every day, and hope he understands why I stayed in touch with him, posing as someone else. I just couldn't let him go, and needed to know that he was okay.
Tags: suicide, depression, boyfriend
Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post.
im so sry dnt feel bad he killed himself because he was a coweredand will suffer.
Posted by an anonymous user on 9/21/2008 7:57:00 PM (Report abuse)
he only pushed you away and tried to find someone new because he knew that by you knowing about his sadness wouldn't let him run away from it, which is exactly what he wanted to do. but he still loved you, and none of this is your fault. you did all that you could for him, and something like this shouldn't have happened.
Posted by an anonymous user on 9/20/2008 8:32:00 PM (Report abuse)
omg, thats so sad, stay at home for a while, call and talk to your friends and family alot and then slowly try to forget or at least block it out, i can only guess how hard this is for you,
but dont give up
but dont give up
Posted by MissingYou on 9/20/2008 2:31:00 PM (Report abuse)
You did everything you could, you were wonderful. You were probably his only solace. I know he appreciated everything you did for him. You are a good person and I hope you find someone that takes the pain away. Take care!!
Posted by an anonymous user on 9/19/2008 8:58:00 AM (Report abuse)
That is a tragic story and I really heard you out. It sounds like a movie almost.
I'm sure that he would appreciate knowing that it was you, knowing how much you cared, how sincerely you wanted to help him.
I'm sure that he would appreciate knowing that it was you, knowing how much you cared, how sincerely you wanted to help him.
Posted by Daisy on 9/17/2008 8:33:00 PM (Report abuse)