That the people I'm related to are suffering from the illusion that I give a crap about their lives.
I DO NOT care about your genius son with the towering I.Q.
I DO NOT care about your grandchildren.
I DO NOT care about how your dog puked on the living room carpet.
I DO NOT care about how you need a new house. Guess what? I need a new apartment, because mine is bug infested, the air conditioning is faltering, the fridge is threatening to break, there's a crack in the bathroom ceiling, and there's lead in the paint and asbestos in the ceiling. There is always someone out there with far worse problems than you, so don't complain. I guarantee many people don't really care about your stupid issues. I have talked to homeless people, people who have cancer, diabetes, and other mental and physical ailments, and trust me, they trump most everything. My dumb-ass family doesn't seem to get that, yet they have the gall to talk down to me and treat me like an idiot.
I mean, I admit, I'm not the sharpest tool in the box, but I'm not a complete idiot.
I've also come to the conclusion that Octopussy (the James Bond movie) sounds like a pornographic film. Tentacle porn.
Also, I sing Katy Perry's California Gurls in the shower, but I sub California with Colorado. It doesn't make a lot of sense, due to the fact that Colorado is nothing like California, but really, if you analyze most things I do, it all just falls apart. And Colorado is very hot right now. Sizzling, in fact. I can smell the smoke sometimes, though I live far away from the actual fires.
Anyways...I can't think of anything else to type right now.