No clue what to do
Posted by kaysmom223 on 5/17/2008 8:44:00 PM
i am 23 years old and have a 15 month old daughter.. her father and i have been off and on for 3 years now and it just seems like its never going to change... we were to be married in august and one month ago he called the whole thing off.. everything the wedding the relationship, everything... it killed me inside to know that i was going to marry someone that could easily call it off and not care one bit.. i feel like nothing i do anywhere is ever enough for some one to love me the way i should.. my family says i am better off with out him but i love him.. he doesnt pay bills, barely makes enough money to support us, pretty much rules my life... i have no car no money and no job due to him... i do everything i could possibly do for him.. he came home to a clean house everyday with dinner on the table and i never complained about anything besides the fact that he would by himself toys when we didnt even have the money to pay bills. i dont know what to do i have given him numerous chances to grow up he is 26 and i feel like he never will... i cant figure out if i love him because of our beautiful daughter or if i truely love him for him... he has no problem going out every night but when i want to go out its the end of the world. i cant have friends and the ones i do have he tells me are losers and pieces of shit... i feel like i am dying inside but i stay so strong for my daughter, because she is my life... i told myself i wouldnt cry while writing this yet here i am with tears rolling down my face.. the worst part of it all is he is trying to come back into my life by telling me everything i want to hear... i cant stand this anymore i dont know what to do and i dont know if i have the strenght in me to try again... or if i even should.... there is so much more to this but i could be here all night..... i dont know what to do!!!!
Tags: love, life, fiance, relationships
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Tags: love, life, fiance, relationships
Comments
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Your family is right. You need to separate yourself from him. Even if you do think you love him, he is not reciprocating that love. A real man will not treat you like he has. I suggest you make a fresh start for you and your daughter. She needs a loving, trusting family, and your b/f does not seem to fit the bill. She will be better off with no father than with a selfish deadbeat who will spend money on himself on stupid things before spending money for bills and things the family needs.
He can always have visitation. There are many more men out there who are mature and will love you (and your daughter) much more than this fellow seems to. It may seem like he's your last hope, that no man will want a woman with "baggage" - but that is far from the truth. Live your life (and your daughter's) the best you can. Leave this man out of it. It seems like he follows a pattern of abuse (controlling behavior) and emotional neglect/blackmail. You don't need to live like that! Your daughter doesn't need to see the tears you shed because of her father for the rest of her life.
He can always have visitation. There are many more men out there who are mature and will love you (and your daughter) much more than this fellow seems to. It may seem like he's your last hope, that no man will want a woman with "baggage" - but that is far from the truth. Live your life (and your daughter's) the best you can. Leave this man out of it. It seems like he follows a pattern of abuse (controlling behavior) and emotional neglect/blackmail. You don't need to live like that! Your daughter doesn't need to see the tears you shed because of her father for the rest of her life.
Posted by Sarah on 5/17/2008 10:00:00 PM (Report abuse)