Reassurance that im doin the right thng even tho i know i am
Posted by anon619 on 8/28/2008 1:45:00 PM
I just need to get all this shit off my chest.
i've been on my own since I was 16, financially and everything.i have 0 relationship with my mom.shes a bitch and helps my sister out with everything, etc, etc.my dad is the greatest person in the world.
i am paying for all my education which has wrapped up over $60, 000 of debt already (i'm a sophomore).2 years ago my dad was diagnosed with esophageal cancer.he underwent major surgery, doctors cut out over 8in of his esophagus and raised his stomach, its basically above his chest now.
he was fine for a year and recently received news that it metastasized to his spine and lungs.they've given him less than 6 months to live.my sister is back at college up in california and i'm back at texas.
i was thinking yesterday, what the fuck am I doing.yes, my dad wanted me to go back to school but you know what, for a father and a man who has unconditionally loved me for my entire 21 years on this planet, has been there through the thick and thin, hasn't judged me, only loved me, what the fuck am I doing over 1, 500 miles away from him.he's been in and out of the hospital weekly now.the least I can do for the person I love the most in this world is to be there with him, whether it be for 2 weeks or more than 6 months.things are so uncertain right now and it sucks.
i'm not gonna lie, sometimes I think "god I'm so far behind everyone else." I took a year and a half off when I graduated high school to go on tour with my band, so now all my friends are graduating college and my sister who is 2 years younger than me is now ahead of me.yes, sometimes I think that i'm behind and that i'm amounting to nothing in this world.
you know what, fuck it.i need to take another semester off.my dad needs me.he's alone and my fucking mom divorced him when he came down with cancer and his business went to shit.all my dad has ever been is a person with the biggest heart, who sacrifices himself and his time for others.
school can wait another semester. loans, financial aid, grants, etc are non refundable because first day started and everything was disbursed so i'll have to now pay more back with no help. whatever, my dad's life is more important.
thanks for reading.reassurance and support means a lot to me.
Tags: school, cancer, death, love, everything
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i've been on my own since I was 16, financially and everything.i have 0 relationship with my mom.shes a bitch and helps my sister out with everything, etc, etc.my dad is the greatest person in the world.
i am paying for all my education which has wrapped up over $60, 000 of debt already (i'm a sophomore).2 years ago my dad was diagnosed with esophageal cancer.he underwent major surgery, doctors cut out over 8in of his esophagus and raised his stomach, its basically above his chest now.
he was fine for a year and recently received news that it metastasized to his spine and lungs.they've given him less than 6 months to live.my sister is back at college up in california and i'm back at texas.
i was thinking yesterday, what the fuck am I doing.yes, my dad wanted me to go back to school but you know what, for a father and a man who has unconditionally loved me for my entire 21 years on this planet, has been there through the thick and thin, hasn't judged me, only loved me, what the fuck am I doing over 1, 500 miles away from him.he's been in and out of the hospital weekly now.the least I can do for the person I love the most in this world is to be there with him, whether it be for 2 weeks or more than 6 months.things are so uncertain right now and it sucks.
i'm not gonna lie, sometimes I think "god I'm so far behind everyone else." I took a year and a half off when I graduated high school to go on tour with my band, so now all my friends are graduating college and my sister who is 2 years younger than me is now ahead of me.yes, sometimes I think that i'm behind and that i'm amounting to nothing in this world.
you know what, fuck it.i need to take another semester off.my dad needs me.he's alone and my fucking mom divorced him when he came down with cancer and his business went to shit.all my dad has ever been is a person with the biggest heart, who sacrifices himself and his time for others.
school can wait another semester. loans, financial aid, grants, etc are non refundable because first day started and everything was disbursed so i'll have to now pay more back with no help. whatever, my dad's life is more important.
thanks for reading.reassurance and support means a lot to me.
Tags: school, cancer, death, love, everything
Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post.
It's awesome how great of a relationship you have with your father. And for one, you are doing the right thing. Your father's life is more important, I'm so glad that you have already figured out what you know is true to you. Leave no regrets for both of you. (:
Posted by Penguin on 8/29/2008 12:49:00 AM (Report abuse)