Subconsciously ashamed of my skin color?

Posted by mylifesux1234 on 5/28/2009 4:26:00 PM (Report abuse)

My complexion is a shade of light tan (like Selma Hayek).I've always been okay with it.Many of the other women in my family are darker than I am (think Eva Longoria) and they've always complained that they look ugly because they're darker compared to me.I never really given much thought to it until one day when my cousin told me, "Well I think the only reason you're lighter than the rest of us is because you hardly go out in the sun and when you do, you wear a lot of sunblock! " Yes it's true.I've always been extra careful to not burn or get tanner, so I use a lot of sunblock.When I was about 10 years old, one of my aunts (whom I hate) told my mom, "I don't think she's fully Mexican, I think she's half black." I was a bit darker back then, and my hair is curly.So I guess that subconsciously, I am ashamed of my darker skin tone and I don't want to be dark.I'm not racist by any means, it's just that I don't want to be dark complected.I pray that the day I have children they won't be dark complected because I know they'll be ridiculed by my family the way I was...
=(

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