Waiting to Die

Posted by WorriedWarrior on 6/29/2008 2:45:00 PM

I am a horrible person. I am a 19 year-old-girl living with my wonderful parents, in a comfortably large house, living on my parents upper-middle class income. I've always done well in school, and currently I'm commuting to a local university will a full-tuition scholarship. It seems like I should have nothing to complain about, and I don't. But I hate living. I don't hate my LIFE, I know I'm very lucky, I just hate MYSELF. I'm overweight and I have been for most of my life, and I've never been one of those girls that wakeup, throw some clothes on, and walkout the door looking gorgeous. And before you comment, realize this...I know that a large portion of the world has it harder than me, and that they would feel blessed living in the same conditions. But I have deep loathing of myself. I sometimes wish God would kill me (not that I'm sure I believe in God,) or someone would kill me. Becuase, when it comes down to it, I don't have the guts to kill myself...unfortunately.

Tags: death, hate, self-pity

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some peopel dont understand what its like to hate the way u look.... i do.... but everyday i try to find something about myself that i love. just try every day something small to improve urself.. go ona peaceful walk everynight. i always do that. just take little steps to improve ur self esteem... its not that i hard. one day, u will make some man very happy... because by the way u write.. i can tell u r very smart and consider others feelings... you seem very intellectual and i think u will go very far in life.... be confident in ur abilities to make the world around you amazing. you can do it. its just those small steps that make everything different... dont let death be the answer... the world is better because of evey individual living here... including you... smile, im sure its beautiful

Posted by Ap4ever on 7/18/2008 12:12:00 AM (Report abuse)

change yuh looks then yuh ugly cunt-------------)
\

dont put pressure on ova people coz yuh hate the way yuh look yuh so depressing

Posted by Amber carrol on 6/30/2008 11:35:00 AM (Report abuse)

so your only problem is that your not happy with your looks??

you have your parents income..buy diet pills and healthy food...dye your hair, get new makeup, get a gym membership...theres many things you can do to lose weight and be healthier, and look better.

so be happy :)

Posted by Kk7 on 6/30/2008 10:51:00 AM (Report abuse)

Dont fell like people are going to judge you when you write these posts thats why this website is her right. Im not skinny but im not fat im right in the middle and theres days were i look at my reflection adn i think i look fucking grosse and i just want to be differnt and have a difernt life but man o man you made a great life for your self and im proud that you let all the bad times pass and make good times. The fact that apperence is practally everything to perople in the world is messed up just by reading that i can tell your a great person smart well kept and you have a out look on life that most people will never understand. Im not tryign to tell you what to do or make any sugestiong becuase its your life yours to live and your too mess up but thought of a better place were apperance dosnt matter dosnt exist this is the world where everyone lives you just have to make due with what you got and try to improve it as much as you can, theres so many ways that you can change for the better i just hope youll give it a try.
everyone has there good days and there bad days but theres no harm
in trying to make them all good

good luck.

Posted by Chantelle on 6/30/2008 6:07:00 AM (Report abuse)

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