When i was a kid
Posted by an anonymous user on 6/9/2008 11:53:00 PM
I was molested for 7 years by two of my brothers. I am not totally sure but i think i may have done it to a younger brother. Just the possibility of this makes me feel like a horrible person that should not be allowed to live. Now he is deploying to Iraq and i totally blame my self for him joining the army. If something happens to him i don't know what ill do.
People have told me that i was a victim and that i was just a kid that did not know that every family in America was not like this. SO THEN WHY DO I FEEL LIKE SUCH A AWFUL PERSON
Since i have tried really hard to remember but i cant i think i may have blocked out a lot of my child hood due to the trauma.
The ironic thing is i am the closet to him out of everyone in my family. But the guilt wont stop i feel like i should be able to do something.
I have been working as a substance abuse counselor for youth thinking it would help me not feel like such a horrible person. But nothing has helped i have been in therapy on and off since i told me parents when i was 13 but i cant seem to forgive my self.
I just hope he comes back alive and then maybe i can talk him in to going to therapy.
Tags: molested, child
Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post.
People have told me that i was a victim and that i was just a kid that did not know that every family in America was not like this. SO THEN WHY DO I FEEL LIKE SUCH A AWFUL PERSON
Since i have tried really hard to remember but i cant i think i may have blocked out a lot of my child hood due to the trauma.
The ironic thing is i am the closet to him out of everyone in my family. But the guilt wont stop i feel like i should be able to do something.
I have been working as a substance abuse counselor for youth thinking it would help me not feel like such a horrible person. But nothing has helped i have been in therapy on and off since i told me parents when i was 13 but i cant seem to forgive my self.
I just hope he comes back alive and then maybe i can talk him in to going to therapy.
Tags: molested, child
Comments
RSS feed for comments on this post.
I would suggest getting some psychological help. You certainly are a victim of your circumstances but you are only holding yourself hostage by not seeking some sort of treatment. Don't feel ashamed, you will never be able to grow from the situation and move on if you bear too much shame.
Posted by Secret whisperer on 6/17/2008 11:56:00 AM (Report abuse)
send your brother a letter, tell him your sorry for anything you may have done when you were kids... thats a start to forgive yourself is the second
Posted by No one on 6/10/2008 11:58:00 AM (Report abuse)