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Go for it!
  • 12/10/2008 4:47:00 AM
I wih you the best of luck. You have my jealousy.
  • 12/9/2008 2:24:00 PM
Whoa whoa whoa. You made VOWS, chica. Doing what you're doing can escalate into more physical stuff--next thing you know, you'll be sneaking around.

The man has CHILDREN. He should be ashamed at himself for what he's doing, and YOU should be ashamed for encouraging him. If you get caught, you'll probably disentigrate both of your marriages. Do you have any idea how badly divorce can affect children? ESPECIALLY if they're young?

If you can't stop for the sake of your marriage, at least do it for the sake of two kids being able to grow up in a stable household. Sometimes giving in to your desires is a good thing--but this time, it's downright selfish.
  • 12/9/2008 2:39:00 PM
Lemons,

Calm down. You can't MAKE a person be quiet who doesn't want to be quiet--at least not without doing something despicable, like drugging her. If there's an unfortunate reaction, you could kill her, and though that's what you want to do at this point, you'll be in a heap load of trouble. Trust me, you'll have even LESS luck at getting an inmate to be quiet.

She, who ever she is, is in your external environment. We can't control what happens around us, we can only control the way we react to it. Don't lose control and get yourself in a situation you can't get out of.

Before you do ANYTHING-get yourself to a private place where you can't hear her. This may not even be possible physically, but if you bear with me and focus, you can shut her out. Her voice can't bother you if you don't let it.

Take a normal, controlled breath in, close your eyes, and exhale. Draw out the exhale as long as you can. This is a tranquilizing breath; it should calm you. If you're calm, you're able to think rationally. Focus all your effort into paying attention to and ONLY to your internal environment. Focus on your breathing, on your heart rate. Become aware of every single sensation. If you focus enough on this, you'll block out everything else.
  • 12/9/2008 9:37:00 AM
Praying for her, honey.
  • 12/9/2008 6:42:00 AM
what does it stand for?
  • 12/9/2008 2:58:00 AM
Take a self-defense course. Teach him a lesson he'll never forget.
  • 12/9/2008 4:03:00 AM
"I think, therefore I am."

If you think you're beautiful, you will be.

If you just can't shake the feeling that you're not (which is untrue), then look to the world and say, "Up YOURS. I am BEAUTIFUL." Keep telling yourself that and it will come true.

Write your own story. Stop comparing your looks with other people's.

Start doing things for your own benefit. Get a new haircut--something edgy that you wouldn't have tried before. Try a new style of makeup--you'd be surprised at how much little tricks enhance the beauty that's inside. Don't however, under any circumstances, start to think you NEED makeup to be pretty.
Go to the gym. Feel the blood pumping through your veins, feel the flush on your cheeks, and marvel at the power of your own body. The human body is the perfect unity of form and function. Put yours to the test physically. When you succeed, you'll have a better appreciation for it than you've ever had.
Drink more water. It'll improve your complexion and just make you feel better.
Change your eating habits. There are wonderful foods to be had that do amazing things for your health.

Challenge your mind with new subjects. They don't even have to be school related. Become informed on a subject most people aren't, like a particular president, a rare disease, African American literature (no, you don't have to be African American), the mating habits of bees, whatever. The more unique, the better. There's a certain satisfaction in knowing that you know something someone else doesn't, and it'll increase your self-esteem.

Be spontaneous.

Basically, what all these suggestions are getting at is this: Set your own expectations of personal beauty. When you learn to focus on them, the expectations of others will fall away and lose their power. And THAT, my friend, is what makes people take notice.

The sun is shining. Step into it, and you'll forget what it was even like to live in the shadows.


  • 12/9/2008 3:22:00 AM
Dear Boy,

Honey, I hear you. Everyone says wait 'til you're older, it'll happen, just give it time... and generally, they're right. But you and I both know that that does nothing to ease the loneliness in times as turbulent as adolescence. I'm an 18 year old girl and I know the feeling. I've dated, but I haven't found the Mr. Right yet. I know it's hard, but you've gotta keep your chin up.

-MS
  • 12/9/2008 5:33:00 AM
Sweetheart,

The love people feel for you is in no way related to your weight, and I don't think I need to tell you the risks involved with starving yourself.

Anorexia and bulemia rarely ever occur on their own--they preceded by other underlying problems (as you hinted at about your mother). You need to ask yourself one question: "Am I losing weight because it'll fix my problems, or because I don't know what to do about them and I feel this is my only option?" Only you can answer that question, and I think you know what that answer is.

There's truth in what liveitup said. You will feel better about yourself if you start running--but it's not the result of losing weight. Your brain releases endorphins, producing the so-called "runner's high". After doing that for a while, weight loss will just be a happy side-effect. You will feel better about yourself, especially if you balance your exercise with a good diet. Food is fuel. If you don't eat, your body becomes subdued, inhibited, sluggish, and cranky. Regardless of how thin you get with this method, I can foresee it causing more problems than it solves.

Love yourself first and foremost, honey. It'll completely change your world.
  • 12/9/2008 9:27:00 AM
I'll pray for you.
  • 12/9/2008 5:46:00 AM
Hello Anonymous.

I am a college student, and I'm more informed on matters of metabolism, nutrition, and exercise than most people. It's been an interest of mine for several years. I'm not trying to brag, I'm simply letting you know that I'm informed on the subject, and that you can trust my advice, because I only want to help. I'm also struggling on and off with depression, which you and I both know is a cause AND result of eating disorders.

First, let me tell you that you in no way shape or form should feel that way about yourself. Judging yourself from other people's standards will never lead to happiness. Plus, there will always be someone "skinnier", so don't beat yourself up over it. If you are overweight, your motivation for losing the extra pounds should be heath-concerned, not self-esteem.

Second, we've all heard the "just diet and excercise" speech. However, it's more complicated than that. There are some steps you should take and things you need to remember if you're hoping to lose weight. They are:

1. Become informed about the human body and metabolism. I can't stress enough how important this is. If you understand it, you'll be able to take advantage of your body's natural functions to get rid of excess fat. This doesn't mean that there is some "secret" to it--each body is different, so it's going to take some personal exploration. One important formula to remember is that, in order to achieve weight loss, the calories you consume must not exceed the calories you use. (Oh, and another thing. A calorie is not a unit of fat. It is the amount of energy required to raise one milliliter of water by 1 degree Celsius. That's right: it's a unit of energy.)

2. Starving yourself is not only dangerous, it's ineffective. In response to not getting the calories (i.e. energy) your body needs to preform basic functions, metabolism is slowed. You'll feel tired, cold, and irritable. When you finally DO eat, your metabolism is so slow that those calories won't be burned. It's like the cells of your body are saying, "Who knows how long it'll be until we eat again? We need to save this for later!" And it's saved as fat.

3. Build muscle. THIS IS IMPORTANT. You are probably looking to become rail-thin, but that's unhealthy and very hard to maintain. Many calories are needed to support the growth and mainenance of muscle fibers. That means the more muscle you have, the more calories you burn just by existing. Don't worry--you don't need to become Miss Olympia. Simply improving muscle tone does wonders for your figure.

4. EAT BREAKFAST. You've been fasting for 6? 8? 10? hours. Your body needs to jumpstart your metabolism. You're actually FOUR TIMES more likely to be obese if you skip breakfast. Train your body to be hungry in the morning.

5. It's not only WHAT you eat, it's WHEN you eat. Timing is extremely important. You shouldn't eat anything within 2 hours of going to sleep. It is the American tradition to eat heaviest at the end of the day, and that is quite possibly a big contributing factor to the obesity epidemic. Adjust your eating schedule. Eat heaviest in the morning when your body needs it, and slowly decrease your consumtion as the day goes on. Also, "grazing" on HEALTHY food throughout the day is more beneficial to your metabolism than the traditional "three square meals".

6. Don't pay attention to "no <insert nutrient here>" diets. Your body is composed of a balance of proteins, carbohydrates, and lipids (fat). You need to find the balance that's right for you in order to support it.

7. Don't weigh yourself every day. It'll make your progress seem slower, and make you frustrated. It's a slow process, you need to have patience. In fact, you're best off making a goal to become healthier in general. The weight loss will come naturally as a result.

8. Drink plenty of water. The doctors aren't kidding when they say eight glasses. One glass of water can jumpstart metabolism for 30-40 minutes.

9. Change up your routine. Eat a variety of new, healthy foods, and don't ban the junk stuff altogether. If you keep it as a reward for meeting a goal, it'll make it that much better. Plus, after a while, you'll find you don't crave it as much.

10. DON'T GIVE UP! You're a beautiful individual on a quest for health. Don't let negative feelings get in the way.

  • 12/9/2008 5:23:00 AM
O
M
G

Me too. Holy crap. Adderall and everything.
  • 12/9/2008 6:05:00 AM
Have you ever thought that her mean streak could have developed from years of being hurt emotionally?

There's enough hatred in this world without you fouling it up even more. It's girls like you that make school hell for other people. You have no right to be mean and nasty, and neither does she. So be the better person and end the cycle.
  • 12/9/2008 2:48:00 PM
Her name would by chance be Mrs. Robinson, would it?
  • 12/9/2008 3:16:00 PM
Objectum sexual. That's what the name for this type of stuff is.

I just read an article about it yesterday. A lady just got married... to the Eiffel Tower. So... it all depends on what it is you're in love with, I guess.
  • 3/13/2009 3:53:00 AM
Congratulations.

You're a sociopath. You're anti-social. You interpret this as being "anything but a normal human being." Good for you.

You're not subjected to the negativity of emotions, and you use this as your claim to self-actualization. Well, Mr. Maslow, you've got a few things wrong.

The Hierarchy of Needs is composed of five levels. These levels are, going from bottom to top: Psychological, Safety, Love/Belonging, Esteem, and Self-Actualization. The needs that characterize each level start from basic human needs, and continue into more abstract ones like respect of/for others, a defined sense of morality (as opposed to "lack thereof), friendship, intimacy, and lack-of-prejudice. By these standards, you are far from self-actualized, as we poor, unfortunate, inferior souls can see.

You're absolutely right, however, about being "anything but normal." That is true. You defined yourself as a sociopath in the very first paragraph of your post. You aren't normal. You are one of a breed that can be defined, diagnosed, classified, and reduced to lowest terms. The very nature of your being can be determined by a moment's research in a DSM-IV. You have a "disorder", you have "tendencies", you have a label. Your actions, your thoughts, your very self can be attributed to nothing more than structural and functional differences in the brain. Neurotransmitters, neurons, and synapses. We poor souls are so unfortunate to be bound by emotions, while you, however, are bound by physiology. You don't feel emotions because your brain is not properly equipped for it.

You, my friend, are not self-actualized. You claim to be, but it is impossible, because your very condition doesn't allow it.

Thanks, but if that's my only other option, I'd rather be "inferior."
  • 12/9/2008 3:59:00 AM
There have been some general comments on here referring to being unsanitary. Just to be more specific, you should know that along with bacteria that results from, well, as Taye said, licking poop out of their ass, cats are also susceptible to parasites like roundworm, tapeworm, and hookworm. These are gastrointestinal parasites, but with the close proximity between your anus and genitals, it's best to play it safe.

Besides. It's a cat.
  • 12/9/2008 8:28:00 AM
This is what pisses me off.

Everyone is different. There are a million different perspectives, styles, beliefs, and tastes out there. No two people are exactly alike. There are a million shades of gray, a million different variables when it comes to a person's makeup.

WHY, when the evidence to the contrary is SO overwhelming, does sexuality have to be black and white, A or B, right or wrong?
  • 6/19/2009 12:10:00 AM
Do it! You'd get amazing muscle tone... Pole dancing is hard work!
  • 4/5/2009 4:32:00 PM
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