Hello Anonymous.
I am a college student, and I'm more informed on matters of metabolism, nutrition, and exercise than most people. It's been an interest of mine for several years. I'm not trying to brag, I'm simply letting you know that I'm informed on the subject, and that you can trust my advice, because I only want to help. I'm also struggling on and off with depression, which you and I both know is a cause AND result of eating disorders.
First, let me tell you that you in no way shape or form should feel that way about yourself. Judging yourself from other people's standards will never lead to happiness. Plus, there will always be someone "skinnier", so don't beat yourself up over it. If you are overweight, your motivation for losing the extra pounds should be heath-concerned, not self-esteem.
Second, we've all heard the "just diet and excercise" speech. However, it's more complicated than that. There are some steps you should take and things you need to remember if you're hoping to lose weight. They are:
1. Become informed about the human body and metabolism. I can't stress enough how important this is. If you understand it, you'll be able to take advantage of your body's natural functions to get rid of excess fat. This doesn't mean that there is some "secret" to it--each body is different, so it's going to take some personal exploration. One important formula to remember is that, in order to achieve weight loss, the calories you consume must not exceed the calories you use. (Oh, and another thing. A calorie is not a unit of fat. It is the amount of energy required to raise one milliliter of water by 1 degree Celsius. That's right: it's a unit of energy.)
2. Starving yourself is not only dangerous, it's ineffective. In response to not getting the calories (i.e. energy) your body needs to preform basic functions, metabolism is slowed. You'll feel tired, cold, and irritable. When you finally DO eat, your metabolism is so slow that those calories won't be burned. It's like the cells of your body are saying, "Who knows how long it'll be until we eat again? We need to save this for later!" And it's saved as fat.
3. Build muscle. THIS IS IMPORTANT. You are probably looking to become rail-thin, but that's unhealthy and very hard to maintain. Many calories are needed to support the growth and mainenance of muscle fibers. That means the more muscle you have, the more calories you burn just by existing. Don't worry--you don't need to become Miss Olympia. Simply improving muscle tone does wonders for your figure.
4. EAT BREAKFAST. You've been fasting for 6? 8? 10? hours. Your body needs to jumpstart your metabolism. You're actually FOUR TIMES more likely to be obese if you skip breakfast. Train your body to be hungry in the morning.
5. It's not only WHAT you eat, it's WHEN you eat. Timing is extremely important. You shouldn't eat anything within 2 hours of going to sleep. It is the American tradition to eat heaviest at the end of the day, and that is quite possibly a big contributing factor to the obesity epidemic. Adjust your eating schedule. Eat heaviest in the morning when your body needs it, and slowly decrease your consumtion as the day goes on. Also, "grazing" on HEALTHY food throughout the day is more beneficial to your metabolism than the traditional "three square meals".
6. Don't pay attention to "no <insert nutrient here>" diets. Your body is composed of a balance of proteins, carbohydrates, and lipids (fat). You need to find the balance that's right for you in order to support it.
7. Don't weigh yourself every day. It'll make your progress seem slower, and make you frustrated. It's a slow process, you need to have patience. In fact, you're best off making a goal to become healthier in general. The weight loss will come naturally as a result.
8. Drink plenty of water. The doctors aren't kidding when they say eight glasses. One glass of water can jumpstart metabolism for 30-40 minutes.
9. Change up your routine. Eat a variety of new, healthy foods, and don't ban the junk stuff altogether. If you keep it as a reward for meeting a goal, it'll make it that much better. Plus, after a while, you'll find you don't crave it as much.
10. DON'T GIVE UP! You're a beautiful individual on a quest for health. Don't let negative feelings get in the way.